But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
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