why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
