I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
