it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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