am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
