Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
