she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
