He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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