I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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