one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
