And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
