Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
