The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
