It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Randomize
