I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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