Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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