Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
