So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I believe in your delicious
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
