Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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