I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
