"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
"it" just moved
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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