Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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