You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize