that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
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