it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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