actually, I'm a sock model
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
