I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
