I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
And then the night went full on bisexual.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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