found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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