I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I just blew my weed a kiss
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
