Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
It was confusing and full of hummus
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
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