just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize