I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Randomize
