i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize