youre lurking in front of me
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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