i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Randomize
