this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
