the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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