I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
