Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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