I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
