No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Randomize
