Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
