if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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