you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
where are you?
Hypothermia
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Randomize