The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
