i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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