Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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