you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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