He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
They have beer where we have blood.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
